wrapped up in my own existence, what i have and is not within my reach,
i question the reason for walking this earth, for breathing this air.
i see others follow the standard motions of life-
college, marriage, parenthood,
peppered with milestones and unexpected events.
i compare them to my own.
realizing that their blessings may not be mine,
i turn inward and feel sad.
'why' is such an unfair question,
unfair to God.
because who am i to ask
when i keep asking Him to lead.
He is patient, He is kind.
He is love.
so i give Him back my dreams,
my desires, my longings.
and i wait,
wait on Him to finish.
or maybe He hasn't even gotten started.
because all this time when i thought He was working,
He was simply waiting for me to surrender.
so here it is, Lord.
here's my heart, do as You will.
You, not i.
You are patient, You are kind.
You are Love.
